Welcome to Ask Jake —
Your weekly dose of gentle truth-telling, radical compassion, and practical wisdom for living a more honest, queer life.
I’m Jake. I’ve been answering advice letters for over a decade, helping people work through their struggles, explore their sexuality, confront their shame, and take one brave step closer to the life they actually want. If you’re here, you’re probably someone who’s asked, “Am I the only one who feels this way?” Spoiler: you’re not.
Every week, I write about the real stuff queer people wrestle with — the messy, beautiful, irreverent, deeply human questions — ranging from self-worth spirals to open relationship etiquette to that one weird thing that happened last weekend that you cannot stop thinking about. We talk about homophobia, identity, friendships that change, families that disappoint, and the quiet work of healing. Sometimes I offer direct advice. Sometimes I help you explore what you’ve known all along. And sometimes I just say, “Yeah, that’s hard,” and that alone can be a huge relief.
Subscribing means you’ll get:
Weekly Queerty classics, the most popular posts, but updated with new commentary
Brand new letters from readers like you (yes, you can submit your own!)
Bite-sized insights (“Jake’s Tips for Meeting Up on a Cruising App”, for example)
Paid subscribers get even more:
Deep-dive letters and subscriber-only questions and answers
Office Hours — where you can ask follow-ups or get quick thoughts in the comments in the chat
Weekly inbox check-ins with mental health reminders, useful tips, and queer scenarios you’ll relate to
And yes — I answer your questions, submitted right here through Substack.
Want something even more personal?
Try the “Talk with Jake” concierge tier. You’ll get access to a private voice chat channel (via Voxer), where once a month, you can leave me a voice message — and I’ll reply with a custom audio response within a week. It’s like texting your wise gay therapist-friend, and getting a thoughtful and personal response.
Everything here is rooted in one belief: You are not broken. You’re becoming.
So come on in. Read a little. Write me when you're ready. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just have to be curious.
I’m so glad you’re here.
With love,
Jake
